{"id":4675,"date":"2017-10-17T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-10-17T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/who-are-you-pointing-the-finger-at\/"},"modified":"2021-06-22T13:11:26","modified_gmt":"2021-06-22T04:11:26","slug":"who-are-you-pointing-the-finger-at","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/who-are-you-pointing-the-finger-at\/","title":{"rendered":"Who Are You Pointing The Finger At?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u3053\u306e\u8a18\u4e8b\u3067\u306f\u3001\u554f\u984c\u3092\u8ab0\u304b\u306e\u305b\u3044\u306b\u3059\u308b\u524d\u306b\u898b\u65b9\u3092\u5909\u3048\u308c\u3070\u826f\u3044\u7d50\u679c\u306b\u65b9\u5411\u8ee2\u63db\u3067\u304d\u3066\u3057\u307e\u3046\u4f8b\u3092\u3054\u7d39\u4ecb\u3057\u3066\u3044\u307e\u3059<\/span>\uff01<\/span>\u3002 \u8a18\u4e8b\u306f\u82f1\u8a9e\u3067\u3059\u3002 \u3069\u3046\u305e\u304a\u5f79\u7acb\u3066\u304f\u3060\u3055\u3044\uff01<\/p>\n

When was the last time you were annoyed with someone? You were sure that what happened was the other person\u2019s fault.<\/p>\n

Have you heard the saying\u00a0\u201cWhen you point your finger at someone else, three fingers are still pointing back at you\u201d<\/b>?<\/p>\n

This was my experience recently.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d signed up for four free seminars run by the same organization. The day before the first seminar, I realized that I had other appointments that clashed with the second and third seminars.<\/p>\n

Pulling out the paper that I\u2019d received when I signed up, I noticed a 5,000 yen cancellation fee!!!<\/p>\n

I wasn\u2019t happy. \u201cHow can they charge a 5,000 yen cancellation fee for a free seminar?\u201d I thought. \u201cThey didn\u2019t tell me about the 5,000 yen cancellation fee when I signed up. That\u2019s so dishonest and sneaky!!! Maybe I should get legal advice\u2026\u201d All sorts of blame and accusation was whirling around my head for much of the evening.<\/p>\n

Suddenly I realized how negative my thinking was and asked myself how I could look at this differently.<\/p>\n

In the West, we\u2019re taught to \u201cread the small print\u201d when signing a contract to be sure we don\u2019t agree to something we don\u2019t want to. In Japan, usually the person providing the contract reads aloud a few highlighted parts, and then people sign without even reading the rest!<\/p>\n

But this cancellation fee wasn\u2019t even written in \u201csmall print\u201d – it was in very large, bold, underlined text. I just hadn\u2019t looked at the paper properly.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s when I remembered about the three fingers pointing back.<\/p>\n

In psychoanalysis, this unconscious blaming of others is known as \u201cprojective identification.\u201d We identify someone to project unwanted feelings onto. I had \u201cunwanted\u201d feelings about potentially paying 10,000 yen for the privilege of NOT attending two seminars!<\/p>\n

But really, the seminar organizers hadn\u2019t done anything wrong. They were simply doing their best to reduce the number of last-minute cancellations. I was the one at fault because I hadn\u2019t looked at the information.<\/p>\n

So what happened?<\/p>\n

I joined the first free seminar (which was FABULOUS) and explained to the organizer that the timing for the second one was difficult for me. He happily changed my registration to another day that worked better for me. And I adjusted my schedule so that I could attend the third seminar.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s amazing to me that I was getting so negative and on the point of not joining any of the seminars. But then I changed my perspective and was able to enjoy a series of HUGELY valuable free seminars.<\/p>\n

And\u00a0now I\u2019m grateful for the cancellation policy<\/b>\u00a0because, without it, I wouldn\u2019t have made the effort to reschedule so that I could attend all the seminars!<\/p>\n

The next time you\u2019re tempted to blame and point the finger at someone else, think about how you can\u00a0look at it differently.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u3053\u306e\u8a18\u4e8b\u3067\u306f\u3001\u554f\u984c\u3092\u8ab0\u304b\u306e\u305b\u3044\u306b\u3059\u308b\u524d\u306b\u898b\u65b9\u3092\u5909\u3048\u308c\u3070\u826f\u3044\u7d50\u679c\u306b\u65b9\u5411\u8ee2\u63db\u3067\u304d\u3066\u3057\u307e\u3046\u4f8b\u3092\u3054\u7d39\u4ecb\u3057\u3066\u3044\u307e\u3059\uff01\u3002 \u8a18\u4e8b\u306f\u82f1\u8a9e\u3067\u3059\u3002 \u3069\u3046\u305e\u304a\u5f79\u7acb\u3066\u304f\u3060\u3055\u3044\uff01 When was the last time you were annoyed with someone? You were sure that what happened was the other person\u2019s fault. Have you heard the saying\u00a0\u201cWhen you point your finger at someone else, three fingers are still pointing back at you\u201d? This was my experience recently. I\u2019d signed up for four free […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":3764,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[55,59],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4675","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication","category-conflict"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4675","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4675"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4675\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10775,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4675\/revisions\/10775"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3764"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4675"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4675"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasugacommunications.com\/ja\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4675"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}