Do you ever disagree with what’s being said in a meeting, but stay quiet? You doubt your judgment or simply want to keep the peace? Or perhaps you don’t question what your colleagues propose – just happily go along with it? Sadly, this often results in weak decision making and feeble action taking.
Purposefully disrupting the harmony of the meeting can help everyone decide on actions that will lead to more meaningful results.
The other day, I had a meeting with Ashina, my fabulous yoga instructor. We were brainstorming ideas for a joint project (we’re very excited about it and hope you’ll love the resulting product).
Ashina and I are both enthusiastic and we value group harmony. A warning sign flashed in my mind. How easy it would be for us to agree with each other’s suggestions and end up with lackluster output. So at the beginning of the meeting, I mentioned my concern to Ashina and suggested that we purposefully question each other’s proposals and assumptions (as well as our own).
In English, we talk about being the devil’s advocate. In Japan, the image of the oni, or demon, is well known, so I like to think of bringing out your inner demon. Picture him as the little guy who challenges and questions what people are saying – maybe causes a bit of a ruckus.
The problem with giving your inner demon free reign without warning your colleagues is that they could easily get upset, become argumentative in defending their position, or conclude that you’re clearly not well.
So how do you get rocking results without ruffling your colleagues’ feathers?
At the beginning of the meeting, agree with your colleagues to bring out your inner demons in the interests of reaching the best solutions. Then everyone can feel more comfortable to speak up and question.
After we made that agreement at the beginning of the meeting, I was delighted when Ashina then challenged several of my suggestions. She helped me to see different perspectives. I felt more comfortable questioning her assumptions. It was an amazingly productive meeting that I’m convinced will lead to better results for both of us.
Are you ready to bring your demon to the meeting?